My idea, the last chapter, speaking up turned out to be more complicated, as I thought. Alone 4 Pages of ten minutes require a decoding capacity of approx. 60 Minutes. I have tried, the quality etc. the video quality (Pixel?) to break down, but technically it came to a stop. Ultimately there was 10 Fragments of a chapter of ca. 40 pages.
So it is like that, Conclusion: that long prose is not suitable for a format like Youtube.
But I absolutely wanted to accompany my last chapter in sailing with my voice.
I don't have a thousand-page work, written as Musil, almost a lifetime, but just a tiny little thing. And yet I imagine a different medium than YouTube for my dogma.
Bytheway: I was recently in a real bookstore again, the former “Stauffacher”, and marveled at how run-down this store is compared to the 1990s, when I worked there, and we even in the train station almost only great literature like Bernhard, Bachmann, Mann, He had to, Kafka, Artaud….sold. And today? What lies on these towers? What's on the shelves? Hardly a classic anymore, fast-paced journalism instant fiction, also draped and printed, as well as content: easily digestible, matched to one of mental hygiene, Fast-forward society trained for sport and narrow-minded self-thrill, Of course, culture is not spared either. Not once “the waves” by Virginia Woolf they had there, instead, of course, fifty copies of the highly polished Prince Harry among the bestsellers…..
Then I thought, that I am at home “the waves” stop ordering on amazon, because-bitter mockery–all special, particular books and authors can still be found there, where they sell them for junk (Amazon! Only a large corporation can afford a hollow?!). I must say, I thought: that serves this bookstore quite right, he didn't deserve anything else…
good literature, special, wonderful, delicious, heavy, devastating, biting lover's literature no longer makes it into the book supermarkets, the kiosk would actually be a friendly alternative… as a transit point, who meanwhile also sells one or two gluten-free sunflower seed stalks…. and smoking and drinking kills yes, only the lazy and the weak still do it, the real vices, the high profile real vices of the past and forgotten century, why also biting, devastating, organic books belong, are conquered and replaced by a pure surface structure….
Of course we know about psychosomatics, that inside an unbeatable dimension lives on and begins to ferment, when you tie the sack off at the top….
I'm so glad for my old poets! They were philanderers, Tunichtgute und leider, leider oft Misogyne. But hey; damals kannte man den Begriff wohl noch nicht, man wusste noch nicht, dass es Mann und Frau gibt, aber das sich Verlieben, das Liebe eine grandiose Katastrophe ist….. die man wagt!
… und Gott…. mittlerweile ertappe ich mich ja selbst dabei, öfters, that i think, I mean, wegen den Begriffen: Die Sprache, die wirkliche Sprache, wenn ich jemandem sagen will, ob ich ihn gern habe oder nicht gern: geht auf das zurück, what I feel! Und nur auf das! Und dann ja…. wenn ich das mal wieder habe… dann kann ich mit dem Denken kommen und das, what I feel, in Stücke reissen wie eine Raubtier. Es ist schwerwiegend, differenzieren zu müssen, begreifen, that this, was man fühlt, dann doch niemals in eine Struktur integriert werden kann, die nur aus Oberfläche bestehen soll….. oder umgekehrt: es ist unbequem, immer neu zu zusammenzusetzen, what has been torn and torn to pieces: to put together better!
But what else is left?? The human heart is a kind of ground zero, One condition, a state of emergency, a fact of authenticity….. this is exactly where you have to go back again and again…..there, where catastrophes can be looked in the eye and no more shells of positivity can be feigned. Apparently they forgot about it out there, that they are students during their lifetime.