I wear a warm one, light tablecloth (same as yesterday), that one spreads out in the forest for a picnic.
Blue Brügg sandals. (like yesterday) Ev. one could call this blue ultramarine.
What i'm trying: den Idiot Scientist (?), who i am, somehow to “the picture” resp. to inform me about topics,
that I think of somewhere, maybe I could use them for mine “quarantine” need.
But I have no exact idea, wie diese Themen resp dieses Wissen/Material aussehen könnte.
After all, everything is, what I have, a personal experience.
When I in mine “Quran” weave in external information material, to compensate for the poverty of events,
that is like cheating. It is, like playing with toys, I do not understand their application.
Because I continue to experience life only from the inside, I ask; but how am I supposed to? “tell”? That's for sure, I mustn't assume, etwas zu erzählen. Ich rede nur, in place, out of my perception. I don't have a past anymore, to be told. However, the present is not enough, to become a running story. I have to be aware of that.—–
At Byung-Chul, I read about intelligence: “Intelligence means choosing between.” (one-read).
She has no access to the outside (Others), because it only has a choice of options within a system.
She inhabits the horizontal, while the idiot touches the vertical.”
Between-read: read in between; but that is exactly that, what I call an idiot (someone from outside) tue. For me, the free access to knowledge and information on the Internet is like one “forbidden fruit”, at which I am arbitrary, serve as you please. I am not changing anything about mine “missing” “intelligence”.
Everything, what I have is personal experience.
An experience, die unaufregend, is to be classified as unexotic and extremely one-sided.
I read something. And forget about it. But what remains of it, I can not say it.
It's always the same place in me, the “learns”, really learns.
I can not “learn” and build it into an experience, what I do not “in their own words” can reproduce.
I cannot learn systematically. Although I would like to and I have often sought pedagogical help on this point in my early years! But I can also say, that there is no “Lehrer” gave, which helped me with my problems in formal-logical thinking. And there is not a certain cleverness involved in teaching? I mean, that one finds out as an educator, how to understand the stupidest student!? Not, how to teach him something! First! Rather: as one can understand, what he doesn't understand!?
There is no other way.
“Vorernähren.” So nenn ich das, wenn ich aufs Prosaschreiben warte.
(25.4.21)
